Let's Forget About Game Six For a Moment

This is called comedic relief. I would know. I'm in a Shakespeare class this semester!*

So to forget about the letdown that was Game Six (and Game Five. And Game Four.) I'll take a look at something slightly more hilarious.

Umpires.


Now I complain about NHL Referees all the time. Yes, yes I do. But at least those guys go through some sort of formal training. At least, on some level, they are qualified to do their work.

This is not the case in Division 5 High School Softball. Those umpires make the NHL Refs look like saints.** Today we played another high school, had the chance to clinch League, and lost. It wasn't necessarily the umps fault, we certainly didn't play too hot, but here are a few gems from the guys coaches affectionately (ha) refer to as "Blue!"

"You know what, maybe I should grab my glasses."

"Did you see that? Was that a strike?"

"I don't know, I didn't see it!" (Referring to a pop fly, trying to determine if it was a foul ball)

"Straoul!" (Strike, ball, foul. So what was it, blue?)

"I didn't see that one. Strike. I have a date at Popeye's after this."

One time our catcher didn't hear the umps' call (ball or strike) so she held onto the ball, waited to throw it back to the pitcher. The ump then told her, "For that, the next one is a ball, no matter where it is."

A while back a girl was running and got pegged with a ball. The ump called her out. Our coach questioned that call. The ump stood with his decision. My coach then told the ump, "Well in that case every time there's a girl running to first, I'll just tell my catcher to bean her in the back." The ump thought about it for a second, then said, "Perhaps I interpreted the rule book incorrectly."

Ah, and these are the guys whose calls can make or break games. Comforting feeling, eh?

And those are just the comments. I could write a PhD on strike zones and umpires.
A personal favorite of mine is the flower-shaped strike zone.

Or the always awesome inverse strike zone! (Also the bulls-eye strike zone.) As always, red indicates the strike zone, clear is a ball.

Trying to figure out an umpire's strike zone is often more challenging than getting Joe Thornton to shoot the puck.

So that's all there is for today. Fun fun fun in the sun sun sun, a post that ventured away from the tumultuous turmoil of the hockey world at this present time, a post that wandered back into the safe familiarity of a baseball diamond. This post is making me feel so American.

*Taking Shakespeare has in no way actually qualified me to talk about technical writing terms and sound like I know what I'm talking about.
**Except Chris Lee, who will always suck.